I cannot convey the depth of joy I am feeling in getting rid of things — The best feeling has been in giving away church music from my 6 years as a church choir director. When I left in August, I remember feeling that I would be damned if I would leave anything of my own but that I had collected for the job I had there to ‘them’. ‘They’ didn’t deserve it! I didn’t owe them anything!
Wonderful how self-righteous we can feel about what we do. What I didn’t realize was that in being self-righteous and essentially thumbing my nose at ‘them’ I was holding myself back and cluttering up my life. And I know now that I may have left the job but I was not free of it. Have you ever held conversations in your head where you go back and think of what you would have said [all of which is designed to make us feel like we are ‘winning’]? That’s what I was doing.
As I said to sister, I really know that I need to be at Engaging and Awakening Others™ again. As I clear my life of stuff, I know that my first pass in this programme where I dealt with, confronted and let go of so much, was not the only pass. After my last Body, Spirit, Integration™ session with my sister, I drove back to Peterborough and listened to CD 9 of Decloaking and Living Authentically™. And then I had a conversation with my father and with my other sister and her husband. And I spoke my truth. And in doing that, I got clear of more stuff.
I’ve lived for 62 years so far and, as I come to own mySelf in all ways, I feel like I’m getting younger. Life is so much more joyous and open. I continue to experience the more that I AM. The acceleration I feel of my transformation and evolution into the woman I truly AM is awesome.
[If you are interested in investigating Body,Spirit,Integration™ sessions, I invite you visit Sheila Winter Wallace at www.sheilawinterwallace.com for more informations].